“Hey, Baby — I Don’t Care About Signs. What’s Your Mood?”
I was watching a show the other day that took place Great Britain in the early 1900’s where the characters wore black arm bands when they were in mourning.
I don’t know if you knew this, but people died a lot in the early 1900’s. I’m pretty sure it’s because they didn’t have Echinacia.
Or Viagra.
Or iPhones.
But one thing they did seem to have was an inherent understanding of the fact that people can’t read other people’s minds.
Bear with me for a sec.
I think you’ll find it hard to disagree that most people, at least here in America, are pretty self-absorbed when it comes to their day-to-day business. When we order our triple-shot-chai-caramel-mocha-latteatto from the pony-tailed, too skinny girl behind the counter at S’bucks, we’re not concerned about what kind of morning she’s having. We’re not worried about whether or not she’ll pass her mid-term or get into law school get an abortion. We just want our damn coffee, because WE are having a DAY.
So we might be a bit snippy with the skinny latte maker — we might be too busy thinking about how she must be thinking about how cool we are in our work skirts and ties and rushing off to a busy busy day to notice the fact that she’s actually thinking about her mother, who’s somewhere in Afghanistan and hasn’t called home in 4 days.
Or her boyfriend, who just dumped her for a skinnier latte.
Which brings me back to the arm band thing. While politeness and compassion are virtues that we should probably practice all of the time, it’s sometimes easy to get wrapped up in our own little whirlwind wonderlands and forget that there are other people in other wonderlands that, on occasion, are actually sometimes a wee bit more jarring than or own.
And maybe, had we known that one of these little satellites within our colossal orbit was having a bad day, we would have been a little nicer. Or understanding. Or… equipped.
I’m talking about mood bands, people.
If the dumpee at S’bucks were wearing a red arm band to symbolize just how ticked off she is at the world, we’d know to leave her the eff alone.
And maybe give her a slightly bigger tip.
And maybe hit on her, depending on our gender or sexual orientation.
Or, if our co-worker shows up to the office wearing a black arm band to symbolize mourning, we know not to heckle him too much about his losing football team. Unless the band is for mourning that loss, in which case he’s abusing the system and should be heckled to no end.
Our waitress is wearing a green arm band? Perfect! She’s happy and helpful and will likely fill our drinks in a timely fashion. But watch what you say — if you cross the line of rudeness and she returns wearing red, you might want to pass on dessert.
I’m thinking I could be on to something big here.
Comments
I love this idea!!!! Mood rings in the 70’s :0)
I loved mood rings. :)
Ha ha! Thanks for the shot of reality. It was a good eye opener after my morning commute swearing at everybody cause I didn’t have my coffee yet. ;)
No judgement — if anyone can relate to road rage, it’s me. ;)
Regardless of what the color of the armband, always, always, always be kind to your server. The coworker is fairgame. As a person who’s been known to open mouth insert foot, I love the armband idea. Nothing like a, “Who died?” followed by an, “oh, crap, I’m so sorry.” Definitely an idea worth bringing back.
Of course the whole system would end up getting corrupted like the whole sex bracelet things that were all the rage with teens a while back.
Ha, Yeah I’m that foot-in-mouth person quite often, too. But unfortunately you’re right — the whole idea would probably get twisted into some crazy relationship status symbol – single ‘n easy, married ‘n easy, etc. Why are there always a few who have to ruin the fun for the rest of us? ;)
Ooh, I like that idea. But then, can I be the armband Nazi)?
Then I can go around telling people to take the freaking black armband off and stop being such a victim and shut the f@ck up and quit whining because, seriously, things really aren’t that bad.
OR you could invent like a blacker armband with a red stripe to show that no matter how bad someone has it, YOU have it worse. So they feel bad about feeling bad.
Hurry. Patent that thing! This is it! Bring on the $$$$$.
Unless it ends up on the same road as Troll Dolls and Slap Bracelets.
Dude. If I could make as much money as the troll doll and slap bracelet people probably made, I’m okay with short-lived fame.
Haha– my mom has a shirt from NASA that says “I need my SPACE!”
Love it!
PS: Dennis, you WOULD be the one to go around saying that, wouldn’t you? ;)
Ha!
Totally a great idea I am behind it 100%……..but i doubt that anyone would put on anything but the “happy colors” even if it was a lie so they don’t run into people that do what Dennis suggests. ….so I have my doubts it would change anything.
PS…..As for the chick that is upset that she got dumped maybe she should think back and see if she dumped a guy using the phrase “your a great guy but …” in order to go out with the guy that dumped her…………..women seem to forget about that part when they are ranting about men in general.
Yeah… the armband culture of yore cared a lot about impressions, so the black mourning bands were actually respected. But I don’t think Dennis is as mean as he thinks he is, so there’s hope yet. ;)
Uh oh, Eugene… I’m sensing you might’ve been burned. Forget her and wait for someone who appreciates you.
You remind me of why I quit retail and will NEVER go back. I’m finally getting past the nightmares… I got tired of everything being ‘my fault’ for customers who had made their own problems and were taking it out on anyone they felt was ‘beneath them’… or was just a target because we had to be nice.
Haha on the arm bands…If they’d change colors, like the rings were supposed to, people couldn’t take advantage. Maybe they’d work better on arms…The rings would never react for me, because I had perpetually cold hands.
Yes — people in service industries have it the worst. It’s like the rest of the population doesn’t think of them as real people.
Haha, I had the same problem with mood rings!